Hospital is bad for you!

It is ironic that you should not contemplate surgery unless you are completely fit and healthy. I went into hospital feeling fine and came out feeling like an old man.
 
I have been suffering for some time with what the doctors call a pharyngeal pouch but which Wikipedia calls Zenker's diverticulum (see picture). I went into St George's Hospital, Tooting to have it stapled shut under general anaesthetic. When I came to in the recovery room, I was told that the surgeon had had a very good look down my throat but could not "find a clean line" to staple. So I will have to go back to discuss an operation via an incision in the neck.
 
I am sure they told me in the recovery room that I could go home that day but the message did not reach the ward. Which was fortunate because about midnight I realised that I simply could not urinate. I called on the nurses in agony and they catheterised me. Given that I had been showing symptoms of enlarged prostate (BPH), this came as no surprise to the medics but a painful shock to me!
 
They said I would have to wear the catheter for a fortnight but when the appointment letter for its removal came, it was to be four weeks after insertion! Worst thing is we are in a heat wave and I am forced to wear trousers! The lifestyle section of the Wikipedia article says "decrease fluid intake before bedtime, moderate the consumption of alcohol and caffeine-containing products". Spooky - they must be thinking of me: I have been doing exactly these things so change is needed.